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Hey Strategic Stylers! 👋
I had coffee with a friend last week who said something that stopped me in my tracks: "I realized I've been calling people my 'support system' who actually drain my energy more than they give it."
It got me thinking about how we often accept energy-draining relationships as normal, especially when those people mean well or have been in our lives for a long time.
But here's what I've learned: Your support system should multiply your energy, not divide it.
If you're feeling exhausted after spending time with the people who are supposed to support you, it's not because you're ungrateful or antisocial. It's because you haven't built a true positive energy support system yet.
Your energy is not selfish. It’s essential.
💡 The Positive Energy Support System Principle
A real support system doesn't just catch you when you fall - it helps you soar higher than you could alone. The people in your circle should leave you feeling more energized, more capable, and more like your best self.
This isn't about surrounding yourself with yes-people or avoiding all challenging conversations. It's about choosing relationships that challenge you to grow while simultaneously filling your energy tank.
Energy first. Impact second. Everything else is noise.
Listen…
⚡ The 4 Types of Positive Energy People
The Amplifier
Celebrates your wins without making it about them
Sees your potential even when you can't
Asks questions that help you think bigger
Leaves you feeling more confident and capable
The Grounding Force
Helps you stay centered during chaos
Offers perspective without judgment
Listens without trying to fix everything
Makes you feel heard and understood
The Growth Partner
Challenges you to be better in loving ways
Shares their own growth journey openly
Holds you accountable to your goals
Inspires you through their own example
The Joy Bringer
Brings lightness and laughter to your life
Helps you remember what you enjoy
Creates positive shared experiences
Reminds you not to take everything so seriously
The world needs you at your best, not your most depleted.
🔍 How to Identify Energy-Giving vs. Energy-Draining People
Energy-Giving People:
You feel more like yourself around them
Conversations flow naturally, and time flies
You leave feeling inspired or recharged
They remember what matters to you
They celebrate your successes genuinely
They offer support without keeping score
Energy-Draining People:
You feel like you need to perform or hide parts of yourself
Conversations feel forced or one-sided
You leave feeling tired or emotionally heavy
Everything becomes about their problems or opinions
They minimize your successes or make them about themselves
They keep track of what they've done for you
🌱 Building Your Positive Energy Support System
Step 1: Audit Your Current Circle
Take inventory of the people you spend the most time with. For each person, ask:
How do I feel before spending time with them?
How do I feel during our interactions?
How do I feel after we part ways?
Do they support my growth or keep me stuck?
Step 2: Identify Your Energy Needs
Different seasons of life require different types of support. Right now, do you need:
Someone to celebrate your wins?
A person who challenges you to grow?
A friend who helps you process emotions?
A mentor who guides your next steps?
A companion for fun and lightness?
Step 3: Seek Quality Over Quantity
You don't need a huge support system - you need the right one. Focus on building deeper connections with 3-5 people who truly energize you rather than maintaining surface-level relationships with dozens.
Step 4: Be the Energy You Want to Attract
The best way to find positive energy people is to become one yourself:
Celebrate others' successes genuinely
Listen without immediately offering advice
Share your growth journey openly
Bring joy and lightness to interactions
Support without keeping score
🎯 Where to Find Your Energy-Giving People
In Your Current Network:
That colleague who always makes you laugh
The friend who asks thoughtful questions
The family member who believes in your dreams
The acquaintance who shares your values
In New Spaces:
Communities built around your interests or goals
Professional groups in your field
Volunteer organizations aligned with your values
Classes or workshops you're genuinely excited about
Online communities focused on growth and positivity
Through Shared Experiences:
Working toward similar goals
Facing similar challenges
Sharing meaningful conversations
Creating something together
Supporting each other's growth
🛡️ Setting Boundaries with Energy Drains
You don't have to cut everyone out of your life, but you can be strategic about how much energy you invest:
The Gradual Distance:
Reduce frequency of contact
Limit conversation topics to lighter subjects
Set time boundaries for interactions
Stop being their primary emotional support
The Loving Limit:
"I care about you, but I'm not the best person to help with this"
"I have limited time today, but I wanted to check in briefly"
"I'm focusing on positive conversations right now"
The Energy Protection:
Meet in public places with natural end times
Have other commitments that create exit strategies
Practice phrases like "I need to think about that" to avoid immediate responses
💫 Your Positive Energy Challenge This Week
Identify one person who consistently gives you energy and reach out to them
Plan one activity with someone who makes you feel like your best self
Practice being an energy-giver in one interaction this week
Set one boundary with someone who consistently drains your energy
🌟 Building Community That Energizes
The most powerful support systems aren't just individual relationships - they're communities where positive energy becomes the norm.
In our Strategic Style Circle, we've created exactly this kind of environment. It's a place where:
Your goals are celebrated, not questioned
Your energy is protected, not drained
Your growth is supported, not sabotaged
Your authentic self is welcomed, not judged
We're building a community of energy rebels who understand that supporting each other isn't about fixing or saving - it's about amplifying each other's natural brilliance.
Remember, energy rebel:
Strategic Style Co. Where strategy meets style (and realistic energy levels)
You deserve relationships that energize you. You deserve people who see your potential and help you reach it. You deserve a support system that makes you feel more like yourself, not less.
☕ Buy Me a Coffee: https://buymeacoffee.com/strategicstyle
🐦 Say hi on Twitter: https://x.com/stylestrategic
💌 Track your energy patterns: https://goalflowpro.replit.app
Your energy is precious. Choose your circle accordingly.
With energizing support,
Strategic Style Co.
P.S. If you're feeling lonely or like you don't have anyone in your corner right now, please know that building a positive energy support system takes time. Start with being the kind of person you want to attract, and trust that your people are out there looking for you too.
Weekly energy optimization secrets for ambitious professionals who refuse to fight their natural rhythms.
